100 Days of Yoga, Day 37


September 27, 2012 by blogmasterjdeam

“For almost everyone who practices, cycles of awakening and openness are followed by periods of fear and contraction. Times of profound peace and new-found love are often overtaken by periods of loss, by closing up, fear, or the discovery of betrayal, only to be followed again by equanimity or joy. In mysterious ways the heart reveals itself to be like a flower that opens and closes. This is our nature.”


This is a quote from the book: After the Ecstasy, The Laundry: How the Heart Grows Wise on the Spiritual Path, by Jack Kornfield.  It is the best way I can describe the feeling of leaving a particularly special retreat.  In retreat, we come together with a common goal: to further our path.  Some of us don’t realize, initially, that it actually is our goal.   It is only in the leaving we realize how changed we are from the experience.  Stepping back into daily life, from that place of bliss, is a rather rude awakening.  Often I cry after I’ve left a retreat — not necessarily because I am sad to leave (although I am) but because I am so very grateful for the experience.

There were so many amazing women there, and I’m not sure I’ll ever see them again.  Because of the closeness required to be in retreat, I quickly fall into something like love with my fellow retreaters.  It is not as if I can say, “well, I’ll see you next weekend, or next month.  Maybe next year?”  Because I probably won’t.  We were all brought together for this brief, intense time in order to learn from one another.  We give and take in kind.  It is a rare and unusual gift.


Be with those who help your being

Be with those who help your being.
Don’t sit with indifferent people, whose breath
comes cold out of their mouths.
Not these visible forms, your work is deeper.

A chunk of dirt thrown in the air breaks to pieces.
If you don’t try to fly,
and so break yourself apart,
you will be broken open by death,
when it’s too late for all you could become.

Leaves get yellow. The tree puts out fresh roots
and makes them green.
Why are you so content with a love that turns you yellow?
 ~ Rumi


Why indeed?

Yours in gratitude,  Chris


6 thoughts on “100 Days of Yoga, Day 37

  1. amy annis says:

    Beautifully summarized.

  2. Nancy Nevinski says:

    Your words speak from my heart. I am so grateful to have met you.

  3. Chris Janeczko says:

    Thank you Amy and Nancy. I am still in that place of full open-heartedness. I am calm and content. I sure wouldn’t mind doing this retreat every other week. Is that something you could pull off Amy?

    • amy annis says:

      Hmmm. I wish. I’m back in full blown mommy swing in Eau Claire. Trying to embrace normal life again and remembering that its the normalcy of this life that makes those retreats so special. Feel blessed that I will always have the memories of that unique group and that degree of cohesiveness. I feel like I was given a gift.

  4. Tammy Cherek says:

    Chris, how beautiful and how true. I’m finding it hard to put into words what a special experience those couple of days on the island were. The best part, and the part I’ve mentioned over and over to all I’ve talked to since returning home, is the most amazing women that were present for the experience. Thank you Chris for saying, so eloquently, what I’m feeling.

  5. Tina frank says:

    Chris, thank you for your presence these past few days at the retreat. It has been so wonderful getting to know you and the others in a way that you summarized so well. I came home from the retreat and I immediately tore into my goodie bag, found my bumper sticker (“may all beings be filled with kindness and compassion for one another”), and placed it so perfectly on my dusty dirty van. That is the first bumper sticker I have ever placed on a vehicle. Thanks to all the women who have inspired me to live more freely

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